Where has all the bread gone?
So according to a recent comment on my blog, I got confused about which team was which in that last post, and McElwain's team actually beat that other team by like 30, not lost to it by a ton. Which makes more sense really. Why the hell didn't my fact checker catch that? (what fact checker? The only two people here besides you me and Scott Baio. I'm not so much a fact checker as a schizophrenic delusion that lives in your head. And Scott Baio's too busy doing cocaine off strippers to check your little "facts" -ed.)
Right. Anyway, sorry about the mix-up. Not that any of you give a damn. Also, whoever posted the comment with all the porn links in it, that's just inappropriate. I like to consider this a PG blog...with a lot of swearing...and often graphic imagery about violence...and sometimes I talk about graphic sexual materials...and there was that one time when we all got drunk and sacrificed a goat to Allah. But still, I don't go to your pornsite and post a bunch of links to stupid humor sites like Scribs or Penny Arcade. Which are both quality sites, you should all check out (also many of the sites linked to in that post are quality sites as well - Scott Baio).
Anyway, tragedy struck today, or at least I think it might have. I went to Meijer, and to Kroger, and at neither place could I find the Golden Split Top White bread that I've ate since I was about 5 years old. Now, maybe they were just both out of stock. Or maybe the package was changed and I didn't spot it.
But I'm becoming increasingly worried that my bread has gone out of business, or isn't stocked anymore, or perhaps I've stepped into some horrible alternate universe where the Nazis prevailed, and all the Golden Split Top bread was destroyed.
I'm probably being paranoid, and my bread will probably be there next week when I look again, and all will be well. But it did bring to me this cold realization: one day, it is very possible that their will be no Golden Split Top bread. Or perhaps Kellogs will go out of business, meaning no more Pop-Tarts. Or maybe Comedy Central will fold. Or some other even more horrible tragedy that I can't even bring myself to imagine.
It's the kind of problem that you never really think about. When they say "All good things come to an end" I always think of college, or relationships, or losing a job, or the death of a loved one. And while those are often very difficult to deal with, I understand that I will have to deal with them. But I never considered the possibility that I wouldn't be able to buy a New Balance shoe.
I'm afraid...somebody hold me.
Right. Anyway, sorry about the mix-up. Not that any of you give a damn. Also, whoever posted the comment with all the porn links in it, that's just inappropriate. I like to consider this a PG blog...with a lot of swearing...and often graphic imagery about violence...and sometimes I talk about graphic sexual materials...and there was that one time when we all got drunk and sacrificed a goat to Allah. But still, I don't go to your pornsite and post a bunch of links to stupid humor sites like Scribs or Penny Arcade. Which are both quality sites, you should all check out (also many of the sites linked to in that post are quality sites as well - Scott Baio).
Anyway, tragedy struck today, or at least I think it might have. I went to Meijer, and to Kroger, and at neither place could I find the Golden Split Top White bread that I've ate since I was about 5 years old. Now, maybe they were just both out of stock. Or maybe the package was changed and I didn't spot it.
But I'm becoming increasingly worried that my bread has gone out of business, or isn't stocked anymore, or perhaps I've stepped into some horrible alternate universe where the Nazis prevailed, and all the Golden Split Top bread was destroyed.
I'm probably being paranoid, and my bread will probably be there next week when I look again, and all will be well. But it did bring to me this cold realization: one day, it is very possible that their will be no Golden Split Top bread. Or perhaps Kellogs will go out of business, meaning no more Pop-Tarts. Or maybe Comedy Central will fold. Or some other even more horrible tragedy that I can't even bring myself to imagine.
It's the kind of problem that you never really think about. When they say "All good things come to an end" I always think of college, or relationships, or losing a job, or the death of a loved one. And while those are often very difficult to deal with, I understand that I will have to deal with them. But I never considered the possibility that I wouldn't be able to buy a New Balance shoe.
I'm afraid...somebody hold me.
posted by drs at 6:50 PM
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